Basic Instructions - How to Create a Running Gag*

Basic Instructions - How to Create a Running Gag*
Rude! But funny! If you are sensitve to crudity, दोन't bother. But, it gave me a much needed smile!

My World and Welcome (Back) to It

Lemme Tell ya, Folks, I was SOOOO scared!



A little background, to set this up- when I was young, and more foolish, I was the victim -survived several sexual attacks. Before I came to hospital. I was anxious to the point i would beg DH to stay home from work any time a strange man was expected- plumber, cable guy, whatever. I could not stand being alone in the house with a strange man. I tell you that so you will get why I was so scared last night when a resident I had never met before crept stealthily into my room.

He was in a wheelchair, and. in other circumstances might have looked comical, cr-e-e-e-eping into my room. But, it was in the dead of night, and I had been sound asleep, so I started awake. Having been "Visited" a few times before by residents who had gotten confused and gone wandering, I assumed this was his problem and told him several times, in various degrees of politeness vs. anxiety and irritation, that he had come to the wrong room. All the while I was pressing the call button to summon aid.

I tried a couple of times telling him as nicely as I could that he was in the wrong room. It's hard to sneak in a wheelchair but he did it - cr e-e-e-eping along the floor. .He whispered in a dry gravelly voice "Call the police!"

"What what what??", I stammered. ."Why?"

"Call the police!", he repeated creeping closer, and starting to fumble with the privacy curtains that surround my bed.

I pressed the Nurse call button again, harder, as anxiety won out over politesse. OPEN the Curtain! !" , I shouted! He had nearly gotten them closed. He pulled them open again. "Now, I was an operator (true), I can help you with the cops. . Why am I calling them?"

"mumble, room mate mumble mumble"

Out of the corner of my eye, I saw a CNA dawdling along in the hallway, apparently in answer to my summons. "HELP!" I shouted as loud as I could. "Please, Goddess please, help me!"

The CNA came in and dragged his chair away while he muttered incoherently and tried to scratch her hands away. Suddenly, the room was lit, and several people came in. I told the whole story, emphasizing that he did not hurt me. At the same Time I was thinking that if he had wanted to hurt me I would have been very dead, and wondering what about his room mate made him so desperate to call the cops. Was he dead or something?

The Med Nurse came in just as I was calling my DH to tell him what happened , and suggested strongly that he should call the Admin guy since I doubted he would ever hear about it from staff. She asked me if I was hurt, and what the man had said to me. I repeated the story she had just heard me tell my DH. She looked at me like I had two heads. "He said 'room mate'? He doesn't speak English. He only talks Spanish to us."

"He spoke it to me.", I repeated firmly. "He said 'room mate', clear as a bell. I couldn't hear what about him, though."

She continued to look at me as if I was the crazy one. After a little while, she left, and I spent the rest of the night alone except for a CNA camped outside my room on a folding chair - presumably to discourage other late-night visitors. This morning, I hear from the morning Med Nurse that the man in question DOES speak English. Sometimes. To a select few. Apparently, he doesn't cotton to the Phillipinas on the staff. Here I am victim once again to racism, and it isn't MY race that's the problem!

Annnnyway, I am surviving this morning,hoping I will get to see Admin Guy who may be taking today off to recover. I wish i could!

Newsvine - The Silver Egg

Newsvine - The Silver Egg

Health Update

It seems as if no real damage was done by Saturday's accident. My CNA was pushung wheelchair, got distracted by someone in the hall, and ran my chair hard into the door jamb. The shock was exceedingly painful, and I had little focal seizures in my hands and lower arms for some minutes of the 45 I waited for a nurse to appear. Why I bothered to wait for her, I don't know.
She reluctantly brought me an Incident Report form, aand I filled it out before I forgot any details. I don.t want to cause trouble for the new CNA , but ya know. when I think of the people not as aware as I am who could be really seriously hurt by such inattention, and unable to complain... I also called my DH and told him, and told the Administrator today too. I want people to know what happens here. The sad fact is, those who know.don't care, and those who care don't know!
About telling the Admin guy, who really is a decent sort, but falls sadly into the 'don't know' category.more often than not, more wierdness this morning. I asked my CNA (not the one who ran me into the door) who I had to speak to to get to see the Admin guy. Without batting an eye she told me I had to go to the Dining room and ask someone who worked in Activities to set it up.
This sounded odd to me, and getting up is a literally painful and time consuming processs,but I wanted to be sure I told him, so I said, "Okay, get me up when you have time, and let's do this." She helped me get dressed. rolled me into the diningroom, and was already walking away when I stopped her and asked thhat she wait a minute. Something was fishy about how eager she was to drop me off and split.
I called over an Activities aide and asked to see the mighty Admin Guy. I saw her excjange looks with my CNA who shrugged in a way that clearly meant , "Who knows?"
"He's in a meeting." she told me. "They announced it." I admit that here, I lost it a little. Dammit, getting up HURTS ! "No one told me! "I wailed. To be fair, my CNA (Certified Nurse Assistant)hjad not heard the announcement either. The activities lady seemed genuinely sorry I was upset, and puzzled as to why I had come to her for help to see the Big Guy. Apparently I had been misled.
The more I think about it, the more suspicious I become that this was a case of deliberate misdirection. The CNA may not have known about the meeting, but she DID know that Activities does not have anything to do with seeing the Boss! I suspect that she planned to just drop me off in the Diningroom to shift for myself, and that I would probably forget all about whatever I wanted to see the Admin Guy for. If not, I would be someone else's problem!
The nice Activitites Lady took me to the mearest nurse's station, promising me that someone there would take me to the Boss's office as soon as the meeting ended. The wait there was not totally unproductive, as I ran into the Physician's Asst. I needed to see. about an unrelated matter.
At length, I got taken to the Admin Guy, who had not been informed about the accident. See what I mean? Anyway, I told him the story, and he is "Looking into it." He gave me his inner office phone number and said he checcks his voice mail often. He also confirmed thta I should just tell whoever my attendant is to get to see him, no Aztivities people needed for an appointmente I hope it will be easier to get to him when I need him for something again!
At lunch, my tablemates agreed the whole story about asking Activities to see the Boss stank to high Heaven. *SIGH* Anyway, we'll see if :Looking into it" producrs any results.

Happy Holidays!

33 years!! Goddess! I am 33 years an Initiated Witch this morning! I remember it as if I had just out out the candles. I smell the incense & taste the wine. I brought some awful Polish mead to the ritual and had to drink a whole chalice full! Ergh!
I learned my lesson though, and have passed it on to Dedicants ever since- bring a wine you know and like VERY much or one you don't care if you will never want to drink again! The herbs in the potion quite spoiled the taste and the texture was cloying. I don't know if that was the fault of the herbs my Teacher added or not , but I still don't have the moxie to try it again!
My Vigil was the longest night of my life so far. And ,even now, it is only (barely) eclipsed by the night before my wedding, I spent that lying beside my soon-to-be husband, the Coven Sword between us, praying desperately that we were going to beat the odds and make our very much mixed marriage a success. I knew then I NEVER wanted to suffer through another night like that! I think if more couples spent the eve of their wedding with the sword between them, we would have a MUCH lower divorce rate!
When the Vigil was ended about half an hour before dawn, Yule, 1975, I was told to wait in another room while the Circle was cast. The bell would ring, and I would have to go into the other room. My robe had a big hood that fell long past my eyes, and when it was up, my vision was poor. I stood there shivering, waiting for the bell to ring, trying to remember the words I had been told to say...
Suddenly, I became aware that someone, also in ritual robes, was standing at the door. I could not see it clearly through the hood of my robe, but it looked vaguely like my Teacher in height and weight. It did not speak to me, but made an unmistakable 'Come on' gesture and stood waiting for me.
Now, I knew that I had been told to wait for the bell. I also knew that tests were everywhere and often came when least expected. Was this a test? I didn't know. I did know that a lot depended on my response.
Thankfully, I had to lift my hood to be able to obey, and that bought me a little time. I fumbled, begging pardon, and lifted the hood, ready to go, bell or not, opting for obedience and praying that was the virtue being tested and not compliance with the Ritual...
There was no one there.
A few seconds later the bell rang and I stumbled down the hall to the room where the Circle awaited me, praying now that it was compliance with the Ritual that had been tested, and that by fumbling I had lucked into passing.
My Teacher gave me no indication, aye,or no..
I went through the Rite in a sort of golden fog. Pieces of it come back to me as I write. A soft glow of candlelight around my Teacher;s bent head, the sharp prick of the sword against my breast; a shock even though I knew it was coming, all went past me as if I dreamed awake. I made my vows and was accepted.
After the Ritual, I said to my teacher,"I was really confused when you came to get me before the bell rang." My Teacher looked at me. "I didn't come for you."my Teacher said. To this day, I wonder who or what came to my door that morning, and to what Initiation I might have gone had I just followed without fumbling with my hood. Whether I passed that test or failed it, I am here, and received the Initiation I had prepared for. I pray now that it was the right decision !
A last story on myself before I close this post. After the Feast was done, and all the candles out that frosty Chicago morning, I said to my Teacher, So when do I start feeling normal again?" My Teacher snorted. "Baby -cakes,this is now normal." After 33 years, my Teacher was right.

Let's be friends

Let's be friends
Just an amazing and beautiful photo. Happy Yole!

Health Update

The pathology reports are back. The other day. my doc came and told me the news. The news is, nobody knows. Well, the Goddess knows. but She isn't speaking to the Path lab! They say the weeping lesions on my legs are not blisters nor are they tumors nor are they symptomatic of an infection.



Just what they ARE, though, no one is telling. The Doctor says she doesn't know what to make of the report. Why she came to tell me that I don't know! It 's not as if I am privy to info the path lab doesn't already have!

Anyway, the cold compresses and creams would be comforting (and torture) if they were as the skin doc ordered, but they're applied sorta like everything else here- hit or miss and at the whim of whichever treatment nurses responsible for this carcass on the day in question. That is to say, not as often or as long as ordered, and most often, not at all. I am yet to receive the treatments as ordered. I am gonna make myself a pest and talk to hospital admin about this. I cannot diagnose the lesions but I have what is wrong with this place at a glance- the ones who give a good God damn don't know what is going on, and the ones who know what is going on don't give a good God damn!

I am still gonna laugh though, so I don't cry. More Info as it develops. The blisters seem a little better even with the uneven application of treatment, and the rash on my feet is definitely better, so I am hopeful. Santissima me ayude! (Holy One [Female] help me!)